When Ziauddin Yousafzai’s first child was born, he named her after Malali, a famous Pashtun girl who inspired Afghans not to give up their fight against the British in 1880. Now that woman—Malala Yousafzai , Nobel Prize winner —has inspired the world not to give up the fight to educate girls.

When she was shot in the head on her school bus by the Taliban, a devastating thought crossed her father’s mind: Was he to blame? Malala’s dad, had strongly encouraged his daughter to pursue an education in Pakistan, defying the Taliban order that girls should not go to school, but should stay silent, marry young, and obey their husbands.“When something bad happens, an honest person asks himself, what was my role? I think this is natural. The day Malala was shot was the most difficult day of my life. In that moment, it came to my mind, yes, could I have done differently? Could I have stopped her? I asked my wife if I had done the right thing,” Ziauddin said.

“My wife said, ‘Yes, you did the right thing. You and Malala are fighting for education, for equality. You are standing for your rights.’”His moment of doubt passed, but he and his wife had to wait in agony for a week, wondering if their daughter would wake up from a coma. When she did, her first words, scribbled with a pen, were about her dad. “Why have I no father?” she asked, fearing he could be dead.

Ziauddin’s influence on his daughter’s life runs deep. He raised his daughter to shun the patriarchal, tribal notions of a girl’s role of subservience in society. A school teacher and outspoken critic of the Taliban, he sent Malala to school at a young age and urged her to talk about politics and topics often reserved for boys. “I tried my best to treat my daughter as myself,” “I gave her a lot of freedom.”

He encouraged Malala to stay in school when she entered her teenage years — a time when Pakistani girls are typically “stopped from going out of the home” and married off, he said. He recalled how a man once complained to Malala’s mother that Malala was showing herself in public, continuing to go to school. He said, “Malala brings shame to the family. You should not be doing this.” When my wife told me this, I said, “This is my family. He should not poke his nose into my family affairs.” ” Now, the same man “is a big supporter of Malala,” Ziauddin said. “Change starts in the close family, then it goes to the extended family, then it spreads to towns and cities and countries.”

Ziauddin grew up with five sisters, none of whom were given the opportunity for an education in Pakistan. They were married off, and never had an identity of their own. “No girl was given an education when I was a schoolboy,” he said. “I saw so much discrimination. Many men in society, they are comfortable with what is going on. Few people stand for change. Whatever I saw wrong in my early life, I wanted to respond with equality and justice. My goal was not to condemn, but to change.”