Recently, a 30 year old Indian origin woman, Purvi Patel living in Indiana, US was found guilty for feticide and child neglect and this has yet again heated the debate over abortion. One of the gynecologists who wrote an article on a website about the case added  if one lives in Indiana and she is pregnant then she can’t think of discussing her abortion plans with anybody and the state has branded Abortion as illegal!

Is abortion still  a crime?

The term Abortion itself is controversial and still in some of the countries and cultures; it is illegal, despite of the obvious fact that  it should be a woman’s right to choose whether she wants to be a mother or not and when she wants to be a mother. When a woman opts  for an abortion the reason of abortion can be anything ranging from pregnancy out of wedlock to a abusive relationship but the experience of abortion can’t be same for all the women. Some women feel free after abortion at the same time other may feel sad or guilty about it. However, it’s perfectly okay to feel in any way after all it’s the woman’s body and she has a right to take her own decisions and feel in a way she wants to.

However, due to stigma attached with abortion and lesser awareness regarding reproductive health rights among women, for some abortion is a ‘Liberating Secret’ and for others it is an ‘Inevitable Guilt’, which they can’t share with others.

For  one such woman Melissa Madera , abortion was a big deal even after more than a decade of her own abortion as she never shared her own experience with anybody and one day she shared her experience with someone who herself had undergone an abortion and she felt she’s not the only one who felt in a certain way about it.

Abortion was one thing due to which she felt alienated but she didn’t want other women who have gone through it, feel in a same way and she decided to listen and share the stories of other women who have had abortion and she started her project “Abortion Diary” through which she shared 92 pod-casts about abortion stories till date. In one of her interviews Melissa said, when she tried to find podcast on abortion she couldn’t find a single podcast and she decided to podcast all stories because listening gives a human touch and it makes a difference on a part of the story teller. The stories are available on The Abortion Diary Podcast

Generally, when we hear about somebody getting an “abortion” ,the common stereotype image is of a young woman who wants to get rid of pregnancy because either she is unmarried or has been careless while having sex or has committed adultery. However, when Melissa collected nearly 92 pod-casts regarding abortion, the stories were of the women who have got abortion at different ages of their lives for different reasons and they all belong to different parts of the world. Some of the women she talked to were married, some of them were in committed relationship, some of them were in abusive relationship, some of them were mothers , some of them were in school and for some of the women it was not the right time to have baby and for some others it was not the right person to have baby with. Some of the women had opted for it when it was not legalized in their country and some other had it done when it was legalized in their country but a stigma was attached to it. And all the reasons were OK due to which they  chose abortion.

For some of the women abortion was a liberating experience as they were clear about their decision and after abortion they were feeling unshackled, unfettered and comforted as in their podcast they said sentences like “I felt celebrated”, “My abortion saved my life”, “It’s life altering ” and “I had a future, I could see “ for others it was their decision but still  they mourn the loss as they said “Nobody does it lightly” , “I have so much fear of shame” , “It ripped my heart apart “and “You can feel both relief and regret”.

Some of them performed post abortion rituals like, a woman and her partner planted a baby tree where they started meditation or a woman who wrote a story and song about her experiences.

Though people mourn their losses, no one regretted their decision as one of the women said, “It’s a choice that shouldn’t be taken away.”

Read OoWomaniya’s Family and Relationship Counselor, Ms. Reupah Philips take on Unplanned Pregnancy and Abortion here.

Do you have your own abortion experience? Voice out and remove the stigma attached to abortion, Share Your Story here

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